Sonnystone Acres

so when i wrote about not dreading, it really came back on me…i’m scheduled to have the periodontal (read gum) surgery on my top teeth tomorrow at 7 a.m. this will also entail the removal of, i think, 2 teeth–possibly 3. i had arranged to have my bottoms bridged on 2/9 and am pretty sure that i can get a partial for the tops quickly–pretty sure, since my regular dentist had already left his office when i called. i’m kind of scared, again. take my advice, i’m not using it.

one more time around the mountain…when will i learn? no more nursing home… no more nursing, as far as i can see. it’s something i don’t want to admit, but can’t deny: there’s no peace in it anymore. i resent any time i have to spend struggling with something i don’t believe in. so many times the “shoulds” in my life have condemned me, but i’ve risen above those rules. I AM FREE!! HALLELUJAH!! (or is that alleluia?)

i have spent the last couple of months fearfully anticipating the periodontal surgery that i had on monday. just 2 weeks ago i called both my dentists and tried to back out of the procedure, but their kindly telephone counselors talked me down from the ledge–and i’m so glad! it wasn’t that bad, even though i have a mouthful of silly putty holding in my bottom teeth and am pureeing all of my food (heaven forbid we should miss a meal). lesson here: don’t waste time dreading what is inevitable. move forward with confidence, even boldness, to accept the pain that comes with progress and growth. maintaining a smile is worth the work.

i could say i haven’t posted often because there’s nothing going on, but that would not be true; it’s just that i’m living so much inside, both physically and mentally. my main activity seems to be eating, but i generally feel bloated and heavy afterward and wish that i hadn’t. i have been walking at the mall around 2times a week (ending with a little treat from the food court). i’ve read several short stories–sherman alexie, david sedaris, steve martin, the new yorker. i have practiced with the kids at the lutheran school for the solo and ensemble contest coming up next week–they are well-prepared and i’m sure they’ll receive high marks. i’ve gone to a new bible study with some of my “old” friends; enjoyed a “christian comedienne” with a strong testimony last night. i’ve bought two vintage footstools from one of my favorite consignment shops and talked with the owner about some consult regarding my home decorating. i’m back with my morning preachers and catching up via the internet on the studies i missed during my orientation last week. today i’m headed back to TheHome to start my weekend gig there and am trying not to dread it. i got some new glasses this week–cute little red plastic things that really work. i seem to be staying up later and sleeping more. it sounds like winter, doesn’t it? so i’ve delved into the burpee seed catalogue and am ordering out some seeds to start. i have some paperwhites and amaryllis to force but have been waiting to complete the painting in the rose room. now it’s done, so excuses have run out. rightmoon and i critiqued the hats at the inauguration yesterday and boychild has been in touch regarding his ongoing crises. husband continues to work extra shifts at the radio and wink is growing by leaps and bounds. all pretty boring, but at least you know i’m not idle.

i’m still here, just morphing quickly….i am trying out a new job…staff nurse at a certain nursing home, working evenings on week-ends….i started yesterday with orientation..today i have an inservice on dementia…tomorrow i will spend 4 hours studying their charting procedures…i’ll be glad when i get to evening shift—i miss my preachers!

last night i attended my first master gardener meeting and received my badge and certificate. i signed up for various volunteer opportunities in order to put in the required 40 hours that it takes to shed the “intern” status and move on to being a Real master gardener…met up with many old friends there and am pretty darn excited about the whole prospect! the husband has worked all night hauling sandbags from one end of the state to the other–his mission: to save all the shantytowns along the wabash (with the help of his sidekick, Dick). wink is not happy with my prolonged absences, but i have assured him it is temporary. in the meantime, he’s running the house.

i haven’t actually been frozen this entire time, but my computer has been! i had a blast from the past on new year’s eve when a grade-school friend who now lives in texas called and came by. it was very healing to see her happy—and her husband is cute, too. husband (mine) and i drove over to louisville, ky to a big flea market with cuzns lana & charley and had a great time…i had my eye on an art deco mini-bar. the seller didn’t seem too interested in selling it to me at the “right” price and couldn’t tell me for sure if it worked, so i didn’t buy it. but i did buy a really hippie blouse, crushed velvet with flared sleeves, and a black skirt that i love. we’ve got the christmas stuff all put up and we’re ready to start painting the rose room upstairs. wink looked high and low for his aunt sugar after boychild left, but he’s settled back into being an only child. i’m officially a master gardener intern now and will “graduate” this month. i’m filling in my calendar with lots of funny fun, so stay tuned.